Good morning all,

It's six o'clock on Sunday morning. I woke up at four thirty, as I do most days now. Today we will be celebrating my son's birthday and I realize that life goes on. I'm so happy to be doing something other than discussing and reading about cancer. Although, I will need to read on the way to Denver. I have two really big decisions to make this week. It seems like cancer has not only invaded my body, but my life.

Well, some of you already know this, but I received the findings of the MRI on Friday. Of course, it had to be while I was at work and I had a bit of a melt down. I don't know why these things keep knocking me off my feet.

Dr. Dickinson called me from out of town to give me the news. It was discovered that the cancer was invasive. When he told me that the cancer was spread out more than what he had originally thought, I jumped to the conclusion that he meant in more ducts than he thought but it was still noninvasive. When I asked the question, "If he could tell if it had spread to other tissue..." I could tell he was a bit confused, because that was just what he told me. He very kindly told me yes, but it was curable. Then it hit me...

He proceeded to tell me that he needed to move up the surgery date and coordinate with my plastic surgeon to do it as soon as possible. The earliest Dr. Dickinson can do the surgery is during the week after Christmas and is hoping that Dr. Boustred will be able to as well. The beginning stage of reconstruction will begin at the time of the mastectomy.

The good news is that he doesn't think that the cancer has reached the lymph node system yet. Again, that won't be known for sure until after the pathologist has examined it. I asked him if I would have to have chemo or radiation. Since I am having a mastectomy, I don't need the radiation but may need chemo.

About the other breast, he found some issues but found no evidence of cancer. He said that my right breast will need to be watched closely. As this is exactly what I was told about my left breast four years ago, this bothered me.

I have an appointment with oncology on Monday to try to help me decide if I should have a double mastectomy. I really don't want to be going down this road again in three or four years.

The other decision that I need to make is what kind of reconstruction to have. I have an appointment on the 17th to look at pictures of Dr. Boustred's work. I hope that this will cement in my mind the kind of reconstruction I want to have.

Both of these decisions need to be made before scheduling the surgery because this will affect the length of the surgery.

Thank you all for listening...and for being so encouraging.

On a good note...I finished my Christmas shopping!!!

Specific prayer requests:

• Wisdom in making decisions this week
• Wisdom for the doctors as they map out a treatment plan
• Courage
• Peace
• Being able to move forward in confidence in the decisions made
• Being able to prioritize my life in a way that puts the most important things on top
• Peace and courage for my loved ones
• To continue to find joy and laughter in the small things